What is the right thing to do? What will I do? What matters?

(This is an example of a possible entry in a journal where one is reflecting on what one has done.  It is a mock up of what a person might write, one that brings in thinking from the "higher, wiser brain".)

Who is to say what the "right thing to do" is?

If I choose to take 4 hours to go and see the last performance of a famous opera person, aren't I doing something enjoyable and intellectually and spiritually stimulating.  Aren't I living the best life?

Who knows...maybe...

If I do that instead of doing something that really matters, is that same thing the "wrong thing to do".  If you end up thinking well of yourself for being a pseudo intellectual, semi-sophisticated appreciator of the arts is that so bad?

In terms of classifying something as good or bad we need criteria.  And perhaps we should shift the terms from the pejorative (judgmental) sounding terms to simply "what is the value of what we are doing" or "does it work to actually produce the most valuable result?"  

Then we are stuck with defining "value".  Value is what has "meaning" to us.  It is what makes us feel good about life and about ourselves.  It is not some ethereal concept.  

Value also has a time dimension, in a sense, to it.  Generally, something of value is considered to be of value for the long term.

Certainly watching the opera performance (a passive activity) has us feel good for a bit and also gives us a pseudo good feeling about ourselves because we are doing something sophisticated and elite (or whatever else we make up about it).  It's ok.  There's nothing wrong with it.

But what if I do it instead of working on my plan to redirect my life in my final years toward creating what is valuable and meaningful, toward "what matters", before I die?  (I normally would feel bad about this and invalidate myself, but I see the sense in my advisor's suggestion that I adhere to the validity of "No Fault".)

What matters:   

 

     My emotional peace of mind and how I feel about myself.

            I need to learn and change the beliefs that have me feeling anxious, shame, guilt, etc.

     Benefit my grandchildren (and children) toward living a much better life

            I need to figure out what I can do to actually create that.

            (This is part of my "leaving a legacy", so that, in a sense, I am immortal.)

If I use those as my criteria, then can I say that going to the opera is something that has lasting value or that it matters at all?  Certainly, it is only a speck added to a mass of such things I've done in life, soon disappearing into nothingness.  (Though I might gain a favorable impression of my life being good and that therefore I can feel good about life - which is one of the four components necessary for happiness.)

Working on my plan, toward implementing those things that matter the most in my life, is doing what matters.  

All that matters in life is doing that which matters (creates permanent ongoing value).   Feeling great about myself and my life, as an ongoing background conversation for my life is perhaps the greatest value of all.  Feeling great about benefiting my grandchildren and seeing them benefit and be better off also has long term lasting value (to them, for sure, and to me, for sure)..

I know this intellectually, but it is so difficult to get myself to work on my plan.  I'm afraid it won't work, I'll stop short, I'll not succeed at it.  I just can't seem to get myself to do such important things. I am just an ineffective person.  I am well meaning and a good person, but I feel awful at times about myself.

So, I'm caught in a trap.  No real confidence and trust in myself and fearful of not getting results and then thinking ill of myself, which feels simply awful, really awful!  

What should I do?  

Well, this time I asked a trusted advisor/friend, who has this huge website and has thought about life and its elements for a massive amount of time..

The answer was that I must intervene in the constantly repeating spiral that is the trap in my life.  I must begin and gradually make headway in breaking the back of my misbeliefs that are causing those emotions, which then cause behaviors that are not forwarding for me.  Going through the beliefs upgrading process is the only path to the solution and elimination of the trap.  It must be done before I am capable of really contributing to my children and grandchildren (or I'll just be fooling myself).  Doing it will be the most significant thing I've ever done in my life toward increasing my power in life.  It is time for me, even at this age, to finally create this for myself

So, I will start somewhat small by identifying the top 5 to 10 beliefs that are getting in the way, using the path suggested by the "Quick Improvement Route" in the information box on the page:  The Program For Upgrading Your Beliefs - The Sequential Program For Learning And Implementation.  Then I'll decide how much further to go from there...

This is now the greatest opportunity of my life....

Will I follow through...this time...?

___________________________

This "possible" journal entry that I've created (putting myself in the place of this person for the time being) could be an example of the type of reflecting that one can do if one is to live a good or great life.  

ALL of those people who are life successful have become so because they spend enough time reflecting on life to redirect and correct it.  All of them!!! 

There was no miracle epiphany nor magic nor others by chance programming the person to "know" what to do.  There is no other valid path to the great life.  It MUST include that reflecting (looking at) and then figuring out how to have things work better, learning that which is necessary to be competent enough.  If those people had also had a path designed for them perhaps it would have taken less time, fewer missteps.  Hopefully, what I've put, so far, on the website will provide some paths where you can just follow the steps (plus a little bit of thinking on your part) to the destination.  You can start with the quick improvement paths (which I recommend) and then take the complete path.  These are linked to from the page The Paths - The Steps To Take To Where You Want To Go In Life .  

It strikes me as preposterous and foolish to live this gift of life without gaining the knowledge to know how to get the most out of life.  The intent of the website and the Alliance is to convince people to take the path of creating true life mastery so that they are truly capable of creating a great life for themselves (and contributing more greatly to the lives of others).  This is entirely doable.  It would be a pity for people not to choose to do it.