The actual benefit of meditation that is different than most of us understand.

 One of the very best responses I've ever received about a page on my site!

It's a quick read (but it has a number of links that you might find quite useful, methinks...)

A Summary Of A Deepened Understanding Of What Meditation Is About

THE REASON WE ARE NOT EFFECTIVE AT BEHAVIOR CHANGE

(To continue to see the full article, click on the title of this piece.)

The reason we are not effective at change is that we are not following the full process for effective change.  We use the wrong process or we fail to complete the process, and then we conclude that we are broken or that “humans are just humans” and are not capable of it (i.e. they are victims of it).  

I pulled the following reasons why effective change doesn’t happen from The Complete Worksheet For Effective Behavioral Change - The Complete Process To Succeed In Change.

“WHAT MAKES THIS NOT WORK

__ I quit too soon. I stop short.  I do not complete (and then I conclude that it didn’t work, 

     when the real problem was that I didn’t DO the work!!!). 

__ I leave off steps or fail to execute them fully, thinking I can take a short cut and not 

     realizing that they are all necessary to make the whole thing work!

__ I succumb to blaming the process for not working, when I should note that it didn’t work

     and then keep on persisting on finding what’s missing and should be added or what’s a 

    wrong step in the system.  I go passive, fall victim to it, instead of going “all the way” to   

    correcting and persisting to the point I actually get the desired results.

__ I fail to notice that the new behavior begins to fade and/or I fail heed the fact that I am not  

     getting the results I want, that I am getting bad results!  And/or I just don’t do the necessary 

     repairs to fix/repair the system.”

So, the question I have for you, is will you choose to follow through to become really, really good at effective change or will you…?  

Essential: 5 Keystone Habits That Take Your Life To A New Level

...I know, I know...you already know this, BUT now it is mandatory that you do ALL of these or you will not, WILL NOT, be able to create a great life (or even a good one)

Read this piece by Jari Roomer:  5 Keystone Habits.

There is only ONE good choice: to do all of them and to do them well. 

(Please let me know of the benefits you derive from anything that I post...and any questions and/or obstacles that come about. 

____________________________________________

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USE THESE BLOGS EFFECTIVELY!!!

See "how to utilize this blog" in the header.  Consider the great worth of learning how to use a blog effectively:  How To Smartly Use A Blog.

MAIN SITE:   TheLifeManagementAlliance.Com or enter the topic you are interested into the Main Navigation/Search Page.   Communicate with me via the Contact page.

Stop screwing yourself over

The title of a TED talk, 20 million views...simple...but...are you doing it?

The Talk

Don’t believe natural inclinations - and master your life...

DON’T BELIEVE “NATURAL INCLINATIONS”, BUT DO USE THEM

It is interesting how we can, when “enlightened”, step back and see that all of our ways of feeling and acting are (mostly, at the core) directed from the actuality that evolution fashioned us to perpetuate our DNA (not to make us happy, except to the extent that it helped us live long enough and procreate enough to successfully pass on our DNA).  Clearly much of our evolved feelings/actions are not helpful and are obsolete or harmful in some cases, given our current world, where we are safe, even though our chimp brain continues to operate as if everything is life-threatening (as was true 10,000 years ago to a large extent).   

But today, to the extent we can, we seek to operate from our higher self’s (higher brain’s) wants to be happy and fulfilled, with a life of meaning, one where we thrive, instead of (Chimp brain) survive.    

Our task is to use our higher brain to look at what no longer serves us in terms of feelings, related beliefs, and actions and to alter those to fit today’s world, living largely without the unnecessary fear and anxieties - to basically have few fears and almost no anxiety all day every day.   

When we learn about this, we become much more intelligent about it, and we see how our “natural instincts” are not always the best.  It is not true that “natural” leads us to the right thing to do or feel or believe - in fact it is a gross falsehood parroted over and over by many people.  Natural does not equal “good”. Natural is not best. Intuition is not accurate.  And there is much more we could list on this topic, but hopefully you get the idea and see through this misleading belief about “natural” being a good guide all the time. (You can consider it a possibility, but then you need to decide upon it while in your higher questioning/thinking brain.)

THEN, HOW DO I USE THIS TO MY ADVANTAGE

But, once we see what needs to be changed and install it in ourselves, we are left with the task of how to utilize our inborn feeling nature to actually enhance our lives.  

Though we do not need to procreate, at some point at least, we can still utilize the good feeling motivation that evolved in us to procreate (have sex, in this case).  We can healthily use it, to feel good in the moment but also more lastingly affect the rest of the day and draw us closer to another human being (oxytocin feels really good!).  

We can use the dopamine reward (and the natural inclination to hope for what is better and/or good) to have us do things that in fact do produce future benefit in addition to present benefits in some cases.  Of course, dopamine is a benefit - it feels good.  We just need to not use it inappropriately like in drug addiction or computer games where it hurts our future selves.  

Cooperation (and its subcomponent of contributing to others) makes us feel good, likely because it was what worked 10,000 years ago to have us survive better (though it is hardly necessary now for our basic needs and not having it does not really threaten our lives).  The same with touch, as it meant something before in terms of survival, so it’ll make us feel good or safer (at that time and) today.  

You can go deeper by reading more on the site, such as:

The Story Of Our Happy And Our Unhappy Chemicals

A Tale Of The Mechanisms For Survival

Understanding your very nature:  Your (Bio)Mechanical Brain/Body - Summary  - See It For What It Is, Create It How You Want It To Be

How The Mind Works - Shorter Version

This could change your life forever.  Go as deep as you need to until you understand it so well that you can go through the various means on the site to drastically change your life for the better (such as the beliefs section and the physiological psychology piece).  

How to do all that, and what particularly to utilize, is another rather deep discussion we need to do later.

For now, realize:

1. Much of what you evolved to do/think/feel is obsolete and should be updated, perhaps using your constant updating mechanism like The Life Improvement Journal, also following a large updating session where you ask what doesn’t serve you in your life, including negative feelings and thoughts, and then list all you can think of AND then go about correcting them, with help from the site or emailing me when you can’t figure it out from the site).
2. You can figure out and/or learn ways to use your natural emotions/tendencies for benefiting your current world realities.

Read the links above and explore this to the point of mastery, as it is an essential part of life mastery.

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Consider also reading  Impulse Management - The First Step To Self Mastery And Directing Your Life

Change is a process - a dose of reality...

A worthwhile piece and a reminder of reality:

Change is a process

(On the site: The Skill And The Process For Effective Change - And A Vital Key To Success In Life.)

This grew my core more than anything...

After observing himself, in his deep journal writing, Tim (2nd language is English) noted how he was able to be so composed, compassionate, and effective in trying circumstances.  He indicated at the end of one post:

“The power pause is the one that grows my awareness at the core more than anything as I see it. I see it more clearly..

I loved this practise.”

Indeed, The Power Pause should be the thing you do the most every day, in every moment where it can be used. I recommend that you adopt it for your lifetime, for a much better life!!!!

The Power Pause.

Let me know, please, what it does for your life. [Contact]

Keith

[Sign up for the blog; over to the right side, the blank, in the web version.  

Never take the low road...it’ll cost you!

(In email, click on the post title in order to read the entire post.) 

The reason not to take the low road that your primitive mind mindlessly jumps to is that it is not a good strategy - it produces bad results.  It costs you emotionally, relationship-wise, attention-wise and energywise.

Low level mind “nonthinking” responses are at the animal level of “stimulus—> response” and typically lead to low level behaviors, not worthy of being a human.

Read this:

To Avoid Traffic Jams, Take The High Road.

And remember to follow the “Never get angry” rule in The Cardinal Rules Of Life - which will transform your life if you truly choose to follow them!

___________________________________________

This is a “Pay It Forward”, free of charge blog and set of sites.  

Easiest way to sign up for email:  If on a cell phone, go to the bottom of a post and click on “see in web browser” format.  Then just sign up in the open slot on the right.

Share: Please share this post with others it could be of benefit to.  Post the link to social media and/or use the little white envelope right below this post (if you are on a phone you may have to push, near the bottom, on "web version" to see it).

Be on the email list or a feed:  On full web blog version, just register in the right hand box.  If on a mobile version, click follow the postsand then choose, in the box on the right, the little white-in-blue envelope symbol to select email or enter your feed. Receive notification of blog posts (and changes on the site, plus books).  

Refer: Please refer others to the blog and/or the site, so we can build a sufficient audience to make this thing bigger and better.  (See the. mission of The Life Management Institute.) 

Use these blogs effectively!

See "how to utilize this blog" in the header.  Consider the great worth of learning how to use a blog effectively:  How To Smartly Use A Blog.

Main site:   TheLifeManagementAlliance.Com or enter the topic you are interested into the Main Navigation/Search Page.   Communicate with me via the Contact page.

Cravings and compulsive behaviors - managing and knowing the core driver of our behaviors

(In email, click on the post title in order to read the entire post.) 

This is from a feedback process based around T's journaling, which we'll link to but introduce here:

T wonders whether he will ever really close the gap in understanding what he is trying to do when he indulges his craving for sugar.

However, the reply broadens this to a discussion of all the drivers for such behaviors - and how to manage them. 

The solution is simple and very doable, though it takes a bit of (very doable) rethinking. 

This is a core understanding without which one cannot master life:  Managing The Core Driver Of Our Behavior.  (3 pages)

Let me know what you think:  Contact.

___________________________________________

This is a “Pay It Forward”, free of charge blog and set of sites.  

Easiest way to sign up for email:  If on a cell phone, go to the bottom of a post and click on “see in web browser” format.  Then just sign up in the open slot on the right.

Share: Please share this post with others it could be of benefit to.  Post the link to social media and/or use the little white envelope right below this post (if you are on a phone you may have to push, near the bottom, on "web version" to see it).

Be on the email list or a feed:  On full web blog version, just register in the right hand box.  If on a mobile version,  click follow the posts and then choose, in the box on the right, the little white-in-blue envelope symbol to select email or enter your feed. Receive notification of blog posts (and changes on the site, plus books).  

Refer: Please refer others to the blog and/or the site, so we can build a sufficient audience to make this thing bigger and better.  (See the. mission of The Life Management Institute.) 

Use these blogs effectively!

See "how to utilize this blog" in the header.  Consider the great worth of learning how to use a blog effectively:  How To Smartly Use A Blog.

Main site:   TheLifeManagementAlliance.Com or enter the topic you are interested into the Main Navigation/Search Page.   Communicate with me via the Contact page.

Changing others with your higher view(ing) of them...

How you treat and envision others has a significant effect on how they behave.  Try it with your significant other, your family members and anyone you associate with.  It will change their lives.

“In Pygmalion in Management, J. Sterling Livingston writes,

Some managers always treat their subordinates in a way that leads to superior performance.But most … unintentionally treat their subordinates in a way that leads to lower performance than they are capable of achieving. The way managers treat their subordinates is subtly influenced by what they expect of them. If manager’s expectations are high, productivity is likely to be excellent. If their expectations are low, productivity is likely to be poor. It is as though there were a law that caused subordinates’ performance to rise or fall to meet managers’ expectations.”

From this email from Farnam Street blog:   The Pygmalion Effect: Proving Them Right good expectations.

No Longer A Victim Of Emotions, Impulses, People, Conditions...Or Anything

(In email, click on the post title in order to read the entire post.) 

If you free yourself up from being run by your impulses and (falsely based) emotions, you will see massive changes in your behavior, mood, and life.

This is one of the very most important things you can do for a better life.  I recommend that you read and implement all of the major strategies - and that you realize that you no longer have to obey or be run by your Primitive Mind's knee jerk reactions that screw up your life and divert you from doing what is best for yourself.

The white paper:  No Longer A Victim Of Emotions, Impulses, People, Conditions...Or Anything.

Let me know, please, the impact it has on you and/or any questions or comments you may have.
(Contact).

Keith

___________________________________________

Share: Please share this post with others it could be of benefit to.  Post the link to social media and/or use the little white envelope right below this post (if you are on a phone you may have to push, near the bottom, on "web version" to see it).

Be on the email list or a feed:  On full web blog version, just register in the right hand box.  If on a mobile version,  click follow the posts and then choose, in the box on the right, the little white-in-blue envelope symbol to select email or enter your feed. Receive notification of blog posts (and changes on the site, plus books).  

Refer: Please refer others to the blog and/or the site, so we can build a sufficient audience to make this thing bigger and better.  (See the. mission of The Life Management Institute.) 

Use these blogs effectively!

See "how to utilize this blog" in the header.  Consider the great worth of learning how to use a blog effectively:  How To Smartly Use A Blog.

Main site:   TheLifeManagementAlliance.Com or enter the topic you are interested into the Main Navigation/Search Page

Identify your "rackets" you pull on others and on yourself.

(In email, click on the post title in order to read the entire post.) 

The other day, a lady wrote to me to get the complete form for Analyzing My Racket.  To be effective in life we all need to identify the huge costs of our continuing to run our "rackets".  The abbreviated form is linked to from the page The Worksheets For Rackets.

A racket is a persistent complaint connected with a fixed way of being or behaving.   In other words, you don't change a way of being even though you complain about it, such that it looks like you are running a "racket" that is fooling someone or leaving one in la la land as far as doing something that costs one his/her aliveness in life.

To understand what is going on with this, you would read Rackets.

To have real freedom in life it is essential that you be "racket free"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

___________________________________________

Share: Please share this post with others it could be of benefit to.  Post the link to social media and/or use the little white envelope right below this post (if you are on a phone you may have to push, near the bottom, on "web version" to see it).

Be on the email list or a feed:  On full web blog version, just register in the right hand box.  If on a mobile version,  click follow the posts and then choose, in the box on the right, the little white-in-blue envelope symbol to select email or enter your feed. Receive notification of blog posts (and changes on the site, plus books).  

Refer: Please refer others to the blog and/or the site, so we can build a sufficient audience to make this thing bigger and better.  (See the. mission of The Life Management Institute.) 

Use these blogs effectively!

See "how to utilize this blog" in the header.  Consider the great worth of learning how to use a blog effectively:  How To Smartly Use A Blog.

Main site:   TheLifeManagementAlliance.Com or enter the topic you are interested into the Main Navigation/Search Page