Your choice: Motivated by fear, guilt, not being "good enough" OR living as a happy master of self?

The following quote is at first focused on only one thing (weight loss), but it is true about all of life.  

"To be clear, domestication regarding body image is different from wanting to lose weight in order to be healthy, or even having a preference to look a certain way. The key difference is that with a preference, you come from a place of self-love and self-acceptance, whereas with domestication you start from a place of shame, guilt, and not being “enough.” ... a Master of Self is one who can look within and determine his or her true motive."

If one notes where the "incentive" comes from (to avoid the negative feeling about self above OR from a view to create a benefit for oneself) then one can choose whether or not to keep the damaging, uncorrected beliefs from harming one's psyche and can choose to alter those beliefs - and by so doing one changes from the darkness of being motivating by the fear side (the "dark side" that doesn't feel good and should only be used when confronted with tigers or something else that is truly, actually, dangerous).

Are you living a life motivated by shame, guilt, and not being "enough"?  If so, you are needlessly creating suffering for yourself.

You will not live in the "light" of happiness until you change that way of believing.  Life will be hard if you keep being driven by fear, shame, guilt, anxiety.  It is imperative, for happiness, that you "give up the drama" and replace it with the "good stuff" (peace, etc.)

Please, please, please settle this once and for all and alter EACH one of your beliefs that lead you (falsely and uselessly) to those emotions!!!!!  (You can use The Beliefs Changing Process.)

The quote is from the Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr, book entitled Mastery Of Self - I recommend that you read it, understand it, and change your life to reflect the wisdom of it.  It is easily "gettable" and can help you in this significant movement away from the "self ruined" life!.

_____________________

Note that "emotions" are chemical means "decided upon" by evolution in order to get us to do something that is life survival enhancing.

If there is something that was valuable 10,000 years ago (when we had our DNA determined, mostly), but is no longer valid, we need to stop the process and invalidate the "emotion" by addressing it in our rational mind, where we make the decision on whether or not to proceed with what our "impulse" tells us to do.   (We can choose not to obey our impulses:  Impulse Control.)

Updating our beliefs tends to "correct" the 10,000 year ago belief so that we no longer act on or created the emotion.

Wanting to keep on eating "sweets" is due to the scarcity of opportunities to get high energy foods 10,000 years ago - and the behavior of "eating all we can store" served us for survival 10,000 years ago - but right now it causes us shortened lives and swings in our moods.  The effect of getting out of the homeostatic zone of balance is very taxing and harmful to our body if repeated more than rarely.
(See, relevant to this example:  The Costs Of Destabilization - Sleep, Sugar, Emotional Chemistry.)