(Click on the title of the post to read the entire post.)
Beliefs essentially are what direct your life, your behavior, and your emotions. They are the very most important determinant of life. You cannot afford to have them be wrong and for them to continue to harm or hold back your life.
They are basically an "If I do this, then I'll get this"" or, which is actually the equivalent, "If this happens, this means this for my survival". If we "think" a belief, then the primitive mind will automatically set things in motion based on what it believes, in a primitive way, will work to make things better - that is its job and that is what we evolved to do, rather miraculously. (Its #1 job is to keep us in The Zone of functionality. This is one of the Super-:Principles of life.)
Since it is essential that we get our beliefs down in a way that serves us best, we must spend the time to establish what is correct and to correct anything that is incorrect. What else would make sense? (But people still continue to just "put up with" the bad results and emotions as if they were fixed and unchangeable - which is not in alignment with reality, at all!!!!! They are totally changeable, especially since we made them up in the first place, either from input or from "reasoning" often at a lower level of thinking!)
The question comes up, once we realize that we must correct our beliefs, "Where do I start?"
Of course, we would definitely want to solve any of our worst beliefs as soon as possible, using the process of identifying them and then learning what is true, then replacing them with what is true and workable, fully installing them. While that is strictly due to going after what is most important and most pressing first, we must also realize that that approach will be helpful but not "optimal", since we will likely not have developed this skill yet at a high enough level. (Even without having become skilled at the correction process, we can benefit by just using the forms provided to carry you through the process.)
So, in building the skill, we must always start at the beginning: Learn what reality is. Then we can compare reality to our beliefs - and know that a belief is wrong if it does not align with reality. Note that you spot an erroneous belief simply by noticing "the sign", which is that they produce a negative emotion. That is a great way to identify bad beliefs, so please do read The Reality Reading Sequence (the whole thing!).
Notice that the first part of the sequence is called "Reality", with several pieces to read in it.
But notice that that section is followed with another essential piece about the skill of Discerning Truth Vs Untruth. Is that not, also, essential? (Think about it. Decide whether you will, for sure, not miss doing that essential! It will serve you well your whole life - and also make a huge positive difference!)
_________________
"Only a fool will tolerate that which continues to do him harm.
The wise, and happy, man is he who has the excellence standard of immediately correcting anything that is not working to produce the results he wants in his life."
The BuddhaKahuna
You become a Life Champion by doing that which works and immediately fixing what does not work - and you spend NO TIME at all in negative criticism or blame, as that has been shown to not work to produce the results we want in life (though many people still, falsely, believe that it does...!??!.)
If you spend but a comparatively small amount of time upfront, doing this correction process, it will pay off magnificently in actually saving lots of time AND it will make life a lot easier - and I mean ALOT!!!
Showing posts with label reality. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reality. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Friday, May 13, 2016
You cannot escape "being human"...especially when out of "The Zone"
(If you get this by email, click on the title of the post to read the whole post.)
It is very human to expect ourselves to be able to rise above being human, where we are without foible and never doing undesired behaviors. However, even the most enlightened of us still has an operating lower, primitive mind that is occasionally not doing well by us and/or is caught up in "inappropriate" impulses and behaviors.
We cannot escape the reality that "Life is a package deal." Though a great package overall, it has its limitations and its "not so goods".
The higher brain is incredibly great - when we are in it. The body is great, except when it is dysfunctioning. Emotions are great, except when they are "negative" due to some uncorrected belief.
We are left with the task, if we want to live a great life, of assuring that we use the package well, such that we get what we want in life
LIMITED RESOURCES REQUIRE ALLOCATION
But one of the great things about our body is that it allocates its limited resources well in order that it can assure (or make better) our survival. This is built into us as a benefit from having evolved.
To best harvest our lives, we need to co-operate with that feature.
When we are tired or out of whack physically or emotionally, our body shuts down other functions so that it can get busy repairing the survival-threatening (to varying degrees) dysfunctions and malfunctioning. The body/mind is committed to restoring functioning to a satisfactory level - the process is called homeostasis. (Even "threatening" to change its established way of thinking can represent a threat, as the mind feels more secure if it is more certain of having an established neural pattern to operate from, and it is insecure when there is none or one is taken away from it and not replaced solidly!)
The further out we are from well-functioning, the more desperate the body-mind gets and the more damage that can be done to the other parts of our body that were robbed of the necessary resources for them to function well.
A simple example is when we get anxious and the body-mind must devote resources to fixing the supposed threat. The fight/flight (fear) response causes us to tense to go into action and engage all the parts of us that are necessary for fighting or running, such as are large muscles, but to do that it must shut down the use of our resources by parts that are not needed in the short term, such as: the higher brain, the digestive system, the immune system, and other parts not needed to save our rear ends.
The problem lies not in the reallocation for a short period of time but in having to do it for such a long period that it does damage to the other parts that are not functioning and which are caused to go into various levels of dysfunction, all the way over to malfunctions that can be damaging.
It is up to us, via engaging our higher brain, to assure that we are not allowing malfunction to continue nor to do its harm.
THE SUPER-PRINCIPLE
A super-law or super-principle, whatever you want to call it, of life is that if you want a great life, you must assure that you stay in balance in all parts of your body and mind so that they are properly functioning. Now, the body-mind seeks this balance, called Homeostasis, automatically in each area, but it is not smart enough to handle the abnormalities caused by the modern world, as it has not hardly evolved or changed from the level it evolved to that was needed 10,000 years ago. (The point here is that the behaviors and solutions that were evolved to function well 10,000 years ago are not suitable for today, so many of them need to be intervened in and corrected by, of course, our higher thinking brain.)
The undapted mind I am talking about here is the primitive mind, which is metaphorically like Lennie, the mentally handicapped brother in Of Mice And Men. But fortunately we have a higher mind, which, if used deliberately, can take over to create the solutions that work.
Unfortunately, when our primitive mind has taken over, when we are in fight/flight mode when it experiences a threat (such as being in anxiety), we are relatively powerless, even to the point of being ashamed that we are being so powerless.
THE ONLY WAY OUT
The only way out is to use the higher brain to figure out tricks, give instructions to the lower brain, use tools that are usable by the lower brain, train the lower brain in simple stuff - all to the point where the primitive mind and a few trained actions can pull ourselves out of the dysfunctional state so that we can restore the ability to use the higher brain - to where we can function well in body and mind (and emotions). (This point is made in Managing The Elephant.)
We are often ashamed of our behaviors, and want to hide, in guilt, this from other human beings. We want to be above being human and then we make it wrong when we are "only human" and do rather low level behaviors or fall prey to "bad" impulses and "weaknesses".
The reality, however, is that no matter how enlightened we get, we still are hooked up with the body and the primitive mind that take over when they "believe" they need to, to protect us from harm (or not filling our procreative need).
But when we learn and accept reality (read the Reality Reading Sequence), we don't see those "misbehaviors" as being "faults" but just as being normal functions of the body/mind.
Accepting reality is the first step, as it allows ourselves to not create an additional alarm and hyperreactivity level.
Acceptance is well and good, but not sufficient, as we still want to eliminate the malfunctioning as much as we can, because it generally harms us or takes away from us something of benefit.
An example of what to do, by recruiting our higher brain and its ability to learn and reason, lies in this "bad habit" that was interfering with life: The Struggle With 'Comfort'/'Escape'Vs. Self-Control: The Spider Solitaire Story. It is about "soft addiction" of behaviors and the escapes or "reliefs" that we think, in our primitive minds, that we need and then, from our primitive minds, the not so great strategies it employs.
Read the above "story" and the solution, but note that we always will be human (and doing "what we would not like to do") and that we cannot eliminate it and therefore are left with the fact that we must deal with it and manage it. And we can only do that if we engage our higher brains to solve any problem (of doing what is short of what is desired and effective).
So, it is best to "accept" the reality of being human AND to be sure to engage our higher brains to solve the dilemmas and problems we get into. And in order to do that and to have the best life that you run your life by the super-principle of assuring you are in The Zone or are returning to it as soon as possible!!!!
Do those fully and you will create the foundation for living an incredibly great life!!!!!
And, note, please, that you will "lose the battle" occasionally, so you must simply get up, brush yourself off, and create a better strategy for success.
Note, also, that when you battle reality, you will lose...every time. So, please make sure that you learn what reality is! (And what it isn't! Read The Believing Brain summary page and use it to better run your life!!!)
It is very human to expect ourselves to be able to rise above being human, where we are without foible and never doing undesired behaviors. However, even the most enlightened of us still has an operating lower, primitive mind that is occasionally not doing well by us and/or is caught up in "inappropriate" impulses and behaviors.
We cannot escape the reality that "Life is a package deal." Though a great package overall, it has its limitations and its "not so goods".
The higher brain is incredibly great - when we are in it. The body is great, except when it is dysfunctioning. Emotions are great, except when they are "negative" due to some uncorrected belief.
We are left with the task, if we want to live a great life, of assuring that we use the package well, such that we get what we want in life
LIMITED RESOURCES REQUIRE ALLOCATION
But one of the great things about our body is that it allocates its limited resources well in order that it can assure (or make better) our survival. This is built into us as a benefit from having evolved.
To best harvest our lives, we need to co-operate with that feature.
When we are tired or out of whack physically or emotionally, our body shuts down other functions so that it can get busy repairing the survival-threatening (to varying degrees) dysfunctions and malfunctioning. The body/mind is committed to restoring functioning to a satisfactory level - the process is called homeostasis. (Even "threatening" to change its established way of thinking can represent a threat, as the mind feels more secure if it is more certain of having an established neural pattern to operate from, and it is insecure when there is none or one is taken away from it and not replaced solidly!)
The further out we are from well-functioning, the more desperate the body-mind gets and the more damage that can be done to the other parts of our body that were robbed of the necessary resources for them to function well.
A simple example is when we get anxious and the body-mind must devote resources to fixing the supposed threat. The fight/flight (fear) response causes us to tense to go into action and engage all the parts of us that are necessary for fighting or running, such as are large muscles, but to do that it must shut down the use of our resources by parts that are not needed in the short term, such as: the higher brain, the digestive system, the immune system, and other parts not needed to save our rear ends.
The problem lies not in the reallocation for a short period of time but in having to do it for such a long period that it does damage to the other parts that are not functioning and which are caused to go into various levels of dysfunction, all the way over to malfunctions that can be damaging.
It is up to us, via engaging our higher brain, to assure that we are not allowing malfunction to continue nor to do its harm.
THE SUPER-PRINCIPLE
A super-law or super-principle, whatever you want to call it, of life is that if you want a great life, you must assure that you stay in balance in all parts of your body and mind so that they are properly functioning. Now, the body-mind seeks this balance, called Homeostasis, automatically in each area, but it is not smart enough to handle the abnormalities caused by the modern world, as it has not hardly evolved or changed from the level it evolved to that was needed 10,000 years ago. (The point here is that the behaviors and solutions that were evolved to function well 10,000 years ago are not suitable for today, so many of them need to be intervened in and corrected by, of course, our higher thinking brain.)
The undapted mind I am talking about here is the primitive mind, which is metaphorically like Lennie, the mentally handicapped brother in Of Mice And Men. But fortunately we have a higher mind, which, if used deliberately, can take over to create the solutions that work.
Unfortunately, when our primitive mind has taken over, when we are in fight/flight mode when it experiences a threat (such as being in anxiety), we are relatively powerless, even to the point of being ashamed that we are being so powerless.
THE ONLY WAY OUT
The only way out is to use the higher brain to figure out tricks, give instructions to the lower brain, use tools that are usable by the lower brain, train the lower brain in simple stuff - all to the point where the primitive mind and a few trained actions can pull ourselves out of the dysfunctional state so that we can restore the ability to use the higher brain - to where we can function well in body and mind (and emotions). (This point is made in Managing The Elephant.)
We are often ashamed of our behaviors, and want to hide, in guilt, this from other human beings. We want to be above being human and then we make it wrong when we are "only human" and do rather low level behaviors or fall prey to "bad" impulses and "weaknesses".
The reality, however, is that no matter how enlightened we get, we still are hooked up with the body and the primitive mind that take over when they "believe" they need to, to protect us from harm (or not filling our procreative need).
But when we learn and accept reality (read the Reality Reading Sequence), we don't see those "misbehaviors" as being "faults" but just as being normal functions of the body/mind.
Accepting reality is the first step, as it allows ourselves to not create an additional alarm and hyperreactivity level.
Acceptance is well and good, but not sufficient, as we still want to eliminate the malfunctioning as much as we can, because it generally harms us or takes away from us something of benefit.
An example of what to do, by recruiting our higher brain and its ability to learn and reason, lies in this "bad habit" that was interfering with life: The Struggle With 'Comfort'/'Escape'Vs. Self-Control: The Spider Solitaire Story. It is about "soft addiction" of behaviors and the escapes or "reliefs" that we think, in our primitive minds, that we need and then, from our primitive minds, the not so great strategies it employs.
Read the above "story" and the solution, but note that we always will be human (and doing "what we would not like to do") and that we cannot eliminate it and therefore are left with the fact that we must deal with it and manage it. And we can only do that if we engage our higher brains to solve any problem (of doing what is short of what is desired and effective).
So, it is best to "accept" the reality of being human AND to be sure to engage our higher brains to solve the dilemmas and problems we get into. And in order to do that and to have the best life that you run your life by the super-principle of assuring you are in The Zone or are returning to it as soon as possible!!!!
Do those fully and you will create the foundation for living an incredibly great life!!!!!
______________________________________
And, note, please, that you will "lose the battle" occasionally, so you must simply get up, brush yourself off, and create a better strategy for success.
Note, also, that when you battle reality, you will lose...every time. So, please make sure that you learn what reality is! (And what it isn't! Read The Believing Brain summary page and use it to better run your life!!!)
Sunday, January 24, 2016
Start with what reality is...read this sequence!
(If you receive this via email, click on the title to see the full post.)
THE ONLY SURE PATH
If you are going to create the greatest life for yourself, you must follow The Only Sure Path To The Greatest Life.
On that path, you will need to Clear Away Enough Time and dedicate it to doing "The Build".
On the way to building that great life, it is essential that you clear away a lot of the accumulated conditioning and false beliefs that you have acquired over time.
Certainly it would make no sense to leave them in place and continue to operate that way, but people often do - wasting much of their lives, causing problems over and over, and sabotaging their emotional well-being.
But they tell themselves that they don't have enough time to correct these - but they waste 100's of times the hours from hobbling through life based on false paradigms and beliefs. We spend time frantically trying to produce what we want, but fail to fix the "production machine" (which is "us" as the producers of our lives and all that is in it).
[The metaphor for how people live their lives is that they get a flat tire, quickly plug the leak, rush off quickly to get somewhere, but do not stop to actually permanently fix the tire...and thusly they keep on springing leaks in their lives, often bouncing along on bumpy tires through their lives, thinking that "this is normal, just part of life"....]
THE FIRST, VITAL STEP TO CLEARING AWAY FALSE BELIEFS
I am aware that you may not like this recommendation, because it takes some time to nail this down.
But the time is well-spent, well-invested, as it yields huge payoffs that actually change lives dramatically, as people begin to be able to see how to distinguish bullbleep beliefs by comparing them to reality... and then correcting and replacing them with beliefs that work and are true.
I think you should always start with determining "What Reality Is" (in the reading sequence below), so that you can compare what you believe with reality - and if a belief doesn't fit reality, then we can see through it and dump (or at least start dumping it by using the Belief Processing Forms). If we don't know what reality is, then we don't stand a prayer of living the greatest life.
So, I recommend that you read and understand and implement into your life what is in the page called The Reality Reading Sequence - Seeing It And The Huge Difference It Can Make In Your Life!
Doing this "homework" is an essential step in building your greatest life.
Let me know, please, how it goes and what difference this makes in your life.
Thanks for stepping up to doing what is necessary (and Not Stopping Short this time) to create a great life!
Keith
Additional recommended reading "The Power Of A Paradigm" in Stephen Covey's The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People - which is also one of the "textbooks" for this Life Course on this site. He suggests that you "examine and test what you believe against reality"(!!!!)
___________
Email this: Click on the little white envelope at the bottom of the post to email the post to a person who might find this useful for his/her life and happiness.
Your comments might be something like this: "I found this of interest and benefit, so I thought I might share it for your consideration. I hope that it will benefit you." Or just send it with no comments or a quick comment "for you" or "interesting" or....
Don't forget to subscribe to the email or other ways of receiving notice.
On the right side, see the "Follow By Email" blank to enter your email. Or use the other "subscribe" options above that.
Contributing to others:
See the post, if you care to, "Referring in order to contribute to others."
THE ONLY SURE PATH
If you are going to create the greatest life for yourself, you must follow The Only Sure Path To The Greatest Life.
On that path, you will need to Clear Away Enough Time and dedicate it to doing "The Build".
On the way to building that great life, it is essential that you clear away a lot of the accumulated conditioning and false beliefs that you have acquired over time.
Certainly it would make no sense to leave them in place and continue to operate that way, but people often do - wasting much of their lives, causing problems over and over, and sabotaging their emotional well-being.
But they tell themselves that they don't have enough time to correct these - but they waste 100's of times the hours from hobbling through life based on false paradigms and beliefs. We spend time frantically trying to produce what we want, but fail to fix the "production machine" (which is "us" as the producers of our lives and all that is in it).
[The metaphor for how people live their lives is that they get a flat tire, quickly plug the leak, rush off quickly to get somewhere, but do not stop to actually permanently fix the tire...and thusly they keep on springing leaks in their lives, often bouncing along on bumpy tires through their lives, thinking that "this is normal, just part of life"....]
THE FIRST, VITAL STEP TO CLEARING AWAY FALSE BELIEFS
I am aware that you may not like this recommendation, because it takes some time to nail this down.
But the time is well-spent, well-invested, as it yields huge payoffs that actually change lives dramatically, as people begin to be able to see how to distinguish bullbleep beliefs by comparing them to reality... and then correcting and replacing them with beliefs that work and are true.
I think you should always start with determining "What Reality Is" (in the reading sequence below), so that you can compare what you believe with reality - and if a belief doesn't fit reality, then we can see through it and dump (or at least start dumping it by using the Belief Processing Forms). If we don't know what reality is, then we don't stand a prayer of living the greatest life.
So, I recommend that you read and understand and implement into your life what is in the page called The Reality Reading Sequence - Seeing It And The Huge Difference It Can Make In Your Life!
Doing this "homework" is an essential step in building your greatest life.
Let me know, please, how it goes and what difference this makes in your life.
Thanks for stepping up to doing what is necessary (and Not Stopping Short this time) to create a great life!
Keith
Additional recommended reading "The Power Of A Paradigm" in Stephen Covey's The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People - which is also one of the "textbooks" for this Life Course on this site. He suggests that you "examine and test what you believe against reality"(!!!!)
___________
Email this: Click on the little white envelope at the bottom of the post to email the post to a person who might find this useful for his/her life and happiness.
Your comments might be something like this: "I found this of interest and benefit, so I thought I might share it for your consideration. I hope that it will benefit you." Or just send it with no comments or a quick comment "for you" or "interesting" or....
Don't forget to subscribe to the email or other ways of receiving notice.
On the right side, see the "Follow By Email" blank to enter your email. Or use the other "subscribe" options above that.
Contributing to others:
See the post, if you care to, "Referring in order to contribute to others."
Saturday, November 21, 2009
The Realities Of Life
High mental and emotional health come when one learns and accepts the realities of life - and then works in accordance with them to create a life one loves.
These are the Realities Of Life. Included are links to the Principles and Laws Of Life.
If you honor the realities and laws of life, you will achieve happiness, for sure.
(Link by clicking on the title of this piece, above.)
Go through each and correct whatever you are thinking that conflicts with those (or if you disagree, shoot me an email and I'll address it).
This will definitely change your life for the better!
Keith
These are the Realities Of Life. Included are links to the Principles and Laws Of Life.
If you honor the realities and laws of life, you will achieve happiness, for sure.
(Link by clicking on the title of this piece, above.)
Go through each and correct whatever you are thinking that conflicts with those (or if you disagree, shoot me an email and I'll address it).
This will definitely change your life for the better!
Keith
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